The Purity Test has historically served as a segue from O-week to true college life at Rice.
But ours is better.

Click on every item you have done. MPS stands for Member of the Preferred Sex.

  1. Studied with a MPS one-on-one
  2. Corrected the professor during class
  3. Pulled an all-nighter to study
  4. Pulled an all-nighter for Scav
  5. Studied in the B-level stacks (you know what we mean)
  6. Gone to the roof of Ryerson at midnight
  7. Been arrested while completing a Scav item
  8. Stolen dishes or utensils from a UChicago dining hall
  9. Made noise on the 5th floor of the Reg
  10. Stepped on the seal
  11. Skipped class
  12. Fabricated results for a lab
  13. Failed to do honest work in college (plagiarized)
  14. Did honest work in college
  15. Read Doing Honest Work in College
  16. Failed an exam
  17. Failed a class
  18. Taken a W for a class
  19. Thought that you failed an exam only to be saved by the curve
  20. Slept with your TA
  21. Taken a class in the Economics Department
  22. Climbed the Mansueto dome
  23. Cited Wikipedia
  24. Gotten so drunk at an O-Week party that you blacked out
  25. Gotten so drunk at an O-Week party that you had to go to the hospital
  26. Went to Valois and didn’t bring cash
  27. Started a sentence with “Actually…”
  28. Gone swimming in Botany Pond (with your consent)
  29. Gone swimming in Botany Pond (without your consent)
  30. Taken a MPS on a Bartlett date where you eat a 3-course meal together on the second floor of Bartlett dining hall
  31. Been in class with a MPS to whom you are attracted for an entire quarter without ever speaking to them
  32. Bought a marker holder or other office supply for a MPS as a method of flirting
  33. Been placed on academic probation
  34. Forcibly removed from on-campus housing
  35. Wore clothes to the Lascivious Ball
  36. Attended a garty
  37. Brought up Karl Marx in casual conversation
  38. Brought up Adam Smith in casual conversation
  39. Brought up Emile Durkheim in casual conversation
  40. Brought up Hegel in casual conversation
  41. Brought up Immanuel Kant in casual conversation
  42. Brought up Michel Foucault in casual conversation
  43. Brought up the fact that Sigmund Freud liked cocaine
  44. Answered another student’s question on Piazza
  45. Stolen an item from your own house lounge
  46. Stolen an item from another house’s lounge
  47. Stolen a traffic sign to be displayed in your room/apartment
  48. Used one of the emergency condoms provided by Student Health
  49. Started a fire in your dorm (unintentionally)
  50. Started a fire in your dorm (intentionally)
  51. Set off the smoke alarm in your dorm without starting a fire
  52. Hotboxed a dorm room
  53. Put out a fire in your dorm
  54. Shit on a school that rejected you
  55. U of C, not U I C
  56. Made a maximized utility joke
  57. Said you’re going to be an econ major even though you’ve only taken art classes
  58. Extolled the virtues of Alan Sanderson
  59. Kept contraband in your dorm room (ie any item which is not allowed to be in dorm rooms)
  60. Locked yourself out of your dorm room while showering
  61. Had fun at UChicago
  62. Been west of Cottage Grove, south of 64th
  63. Been on the Pink Line
  64. Purchased alcohol at Kimbark Beverages
  65. Misused ORCSA funds
  66. Complained that Common App is making UChicago kids less weird
  67. Discussed the glory of manly sports
  68. Attended a UChicago sporting event
  69. Known where Logan is
  70. Known the story of the Satellite Dorms
  71. Studied a dead language
  72. Pronounced ‘Tolkein’ as ‘Toll-keen’
  73. Traveled through as many connected buildings as possible
  74. Been into the steam tunnels
  75. Been mistaken for a professor
  76. Worn shorts and/or flip-flops in the winter
  77. Been in the administration building
  78. Been in the HR building
  79. Been on a first-name basis with any UChicago administrator (voluntarily or involuntarily)
  80. Taken the UChicago swimming test
  81. Taken a UChicago athletics class
  82. Insisted that you are a fourth-year and not a senior (or similar for other years)
  83. Bragged about your SAT or ACT scores
  84. Had an O-mance
  85. Bragged about applying and/or getting in early action/early decision
  86. Bragged about your AP/IB scores
  87. Took Orgo or Honors Analysis as a first-year
  88. Casually discussed monads
  89. Extolled the virtues of Haskell, Scheme, or Typed Racket
  90. Played a computer game in class
  91. Showed up to class drunk, hungover, and/or high
  92. Brought alcohol and/or drugs to class
  93. Consumed alcohol and/or drugs on the quad
  94. Been late for a final exam
  95. Failed to call your mom during Scav
  96. Slept with a Judge for points
  97. Slept with a Judge for non-point-related reasons
  98. Flim-flammed the Zim-zam
  99. Had a discussion in a bathroom lasting at least one hour
  100. Faked it till you maked it during a Hum or Sosc class

Your score: